


Lose My Mind

by flarrow_bitches (MaybeImToBlame)



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Anal, Anal Fingering, Anal Play, Anal Plug, Anal Sex, Bottom!Barry, Bottom!Oliver, Dirty Talk, F/M, M/M, Masturbation, Masturbation in Shower, Rough Sex, Roughness, Shower Sex, Top!Barry, Toys, top!oliver
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-19
Updated: 2016-01-21
Packaged: 2018-05-15 00:35:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 17,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5764936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaybeImToBlame/pseuds/flarrow_bitches
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oliver can’t get the idea of Barry topping him out of his head.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You Got Me Perfectly Confused

**Author's Note:**

  * For [starrxlorrd](https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrxlorrd/gifts), [Lady Dragon (tsukiryuu)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsukiryuu/gifts).



> The title and the lyrics used in this come from Brett Eldredge’s “Lose My Mind” it’s a great song, give it a listen if you’d like. I’d recommend it. He’s one of the only contemporary male country singers these days who doesn’t completely suck. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ And we’re getting off topic… I don’t own any of the characters used in this fic, they all belong to DC Comics respectively. If I did, you can bet your ass Olivarry would’ve been a couple a long time ago.

_You make all my screws come loose_  
_Got me perfectly confused_  
_Always find a way to mess me up and drive me wild  
I love the way you make me lose my mind_

 

Barry’s legs were bracketing Oliver’s waist to the point where he was practically bent in half, he and Oliver were flush chest to chest. Oliver’s hips working at speeds that would’ve made Barry question who in this relationship was actually The Flash, that is if he’d been able to form a coherent thought at all, which at the moment, he couldn’t. 

“Ollver… fuck… Ollie… oh god. Oh god… ohmyfuckingod….” Barry babbled. Oliver was grunting into the younger man’s shoulder as his hands gripped Barry’s hips roughly, holding him down as he fucked into him mercilessly on the bed. Barry’s hands slid from where they were at his side to wrap around Oliver, his nails scraped down Oliver’s back and his hands came to rest on the taut muscular globes of Oliver’s ass. He could barely think, his body so close to the edge of release, but he wanted the two of them to come together… or at least as close together as they could. And then an idea struck him, he fought through the haze to coherently move his hands, pulling apart Oliver’s ass cheeks and run his pointer finger around the rim of the older man’s asshole. It was a feat, considering how much the older man was moving, but he managed. His hand and fingers were still slick with lube from jacking himself off between their bodies and he managed to worm the finger into Oliver slowly. 

Oliver felt something at his entrance, and he was shocked out of his sexual bliss momentarily, they’d never done anything like this before, but holy shit, was that Barry’s finger? Was Barry trying to finger him? He involuntarily relaxed his muscles, his thrusts slowing as Barry’s finger pushed its way inside, and holyfuckinghell… that was hot. He moaned into Barry’s shoulder and bit down hard, hips speeding up as he felt his release nearing. A loud moan from Barry and a new found slickness between their bodies alerted him that Barry had just cum. Oliver continued to thrust into Barry, and Barry’s finger continued to push its way up into Oliver’s body, Barry crooked his finger slightly and Oliver practically screamed into the bed, his hips going crazy again, the stimulation around his cock from Barry’s ass and the finger that was now pressing into him deeply pushing him over the edge. He saw white and was coming harder than he ever had before, whimpers, moans, curses, and grunts falling from his lips as he rode his orgasm out. When he came to, he found that Barry’s finger was no longer in his ass, allowing him to pull out and roll off of Barry and collapse down on his back as his heart rate returned back to normal. He felt Barry cuddle into his side and he instinctively wrapped an arm around him. When Oliver felt normal again he looked down at Barry who was now fast asleep. No doubt as soon as he woke up he’d be begging Oliver to bring him food and pretending he was incapable of even standing, who knows, he might really be this time considering the round they’d just went, but currently the room was quiet and still. And Oliver’s thoughts began to wonder to the sex they’d just had. 

Barry had reached down and shoved a finger inside of him, unexpectedly, and he’d liked it. Loved it in fact. It was one of the hottest things he’d ever experienced in their sex life so far, maybe it was just because it was new, or done in the heat of the moment, but he couldn’t help to feel unsettled by it. He’d always been the more dominant one in relationships, he was a guy who liked to be in charge in general, and the idea that Barry made him completely fall apart like that, so suddenly, honestly scared him. He’d always seen himself as strictly a top, since he’d learned what tops and bottoms were. Why was he suddenly feeling otherwise? Sure it had felt good, but it was probably just a heat of the moment thing. Nothing to truly contemplate. It didn’t make him any less of a man for liking it right? God. That was stupid. He hated himself for even thinking that. Barry liked bottoming and he was just as much of a man as he was. Still, the thought bottoming and liking it made him feel uncomfortable. Still he couldn’t help his mind from wandering to how hot it had been… and as he closed his eyes a vision of Barry between his legs, pounding him into the mattress, making him moan and scream flashed through his brain, causing his cock to involuntarily rise. He groaned. He wanted it so badly… but he couldn’t shake the uneasiness he felt at the whole idea. He groaned and willed himself to think of anything to make his erection go down… a few thoughts about Lian-Yu later, and yup, that worked. He willed all the thoughts of their most recent sexual encounter out of his mind and concentrated on more innocent thoughts of the younger man who was adorably scrunching his nose up in his sleep and trying to burrow deeper into his side before finally falling asleep. 

\----

Oliver and Barry had managed to see each other on and off every few days or so for the last month, it seemed that whenever Barry had more than a few hours he’d be running to Starling to see Oliver. Their time was spent in various ways, sometimes in the Arrow cave, with Felicity and Barry geeking out as Oliver did his best to conduct research on possible leads for whomever he was heading after next. The two simply just enjoying being in the same space as one and other. Other times they’d spend their time in the loft being lazy, watching movies and TV shows and cuddling on the couch. Double dates with Roy and Thea became a common thing among them as well, and surprisingly they weren’t ask awkward as Oliver originally thought they’d be. And on the nights that Barry was able to stay over, the two would usually end up in bed, finding new ways to keep each other going until all hours of the morning. 

Oliver had tried not to think about Barry fucking him every time they got down and dirty. But it was becoming harder and harder to ignore. Don’t get him wrong, he absolutely loved being the one to make love to Barry, or on the rough nights fuck him into the sheets until he couldn’t even say his own name. But there was a constant itch, always there, as he fingered Barry open, or as he entered him, the curious thoughts in the back of his head to what that could be like nagged at him. Oliver had been careful to keep Barry’s hands from wandering, because although he was curious he was still scared of having Barry inside him again. God this was all so confusing. He wanted it, but he didn’t want it. At the moment his frustrations were getting the better of him. He and Barry had been making love, they’d just gotten back from a nice dinner at an Italian restaurant, and Barry had been the one who initiated their lovemaking this time, kissing Oliver deeply and telling him that he would like nothing more than to be taken to bed, and the gentlemen that Oliver was, he kissed him deeply, picked him up and carried him to their room before stripping him slowly and beginning his seduction.

Barry was on his front this time, Oliver had just breached his hole with his cock and Barry had moaned, Oliver felt the tightness of Barry surround him and he couldn’t help but think of Barry pressing into him like this, and fuck… not again. Well that didn’t take long. Why couldn’t he enjoy one sexual encounter with Barry without thinking of their roles being reversed, it was ridiculous. He’d always been perfectly satisfied with topping before so what the hell changed. Well he knew what the Hell changed, Barry had gone and stuck a finger up his ass and made him feel things he never thought he’d feel. His frustrations were getting the better of him and he found himself pounding into Barry at a merciless pace, gripping his hips hard enough to bruise and holding him down with a determined crease to his brow. Barry was gasping and grappling at the sheets for purchase, he turned his head and looked at Oliver, opening his mouth to speak but then Oliver hit his prostate and whatever he was saying was cut off by a cry of ecstasy. Oliver continued fucking him, his mind running on overdrive, he was pissed at this point and he wasn’t even paying attention to what he was doing. He felt his release nearing and he came into Barry with a growl before pulling out roughly and standing up to go clean himself off. He was all sweaty and uncomfortable. Their sex had done nothing to sedate him like it usually did, it only managed to rile him up even more it seemed. 

Barry lied there on his stomach still trying to catch his breath from the massive orgasm and tantalizingly perfect amount of over stimulation he’d just been put through, he wasn’t complaining. He’d liked it, but it was an abrupt turn. Oliver had undressed him slowly, placing kisses everywhere his lips could reach, he’d reached his first orgasm by having Oliver simply grind against him before taking his cock in his hand and slowly jacking him to oblivion. He’d asked him to turn over in a soft voice and kissed his shoulder blade with care before fingering him open slowly, and then it was as if Oliver became a different person, the first few thrusts were slow and tender, but then he seemed to go wild. Thrusting harder and harder, hands gripping his hips in a vice-like grip. Fucking him until he saw stars, though not one, but two orgasms, and on his way into a dry third one. He’d pulled out so abruptly and seemed to push his body away, Barry could’ve sworn he’d heard an angry growl somewhere in the haze but he was so fucked out he wasn’t sure. All he knew was that Oliver had left him on the bed uncovered and exposed to the chilly air of the loft, before his heavy footsteps made their way across the floor and the door of the bathroom creaked it’s way shut, it sounded like he was starting the shower and that was weird because even though Oliver didn’t like to admit it, he loved cuddling after any type of sex, and if they were to shower, most of the time he’d ask Barry to join. He was so tired and so spent, and as much as he wanted to keep his eyes open and will himself to find the strength to go check on Oliver, his body was too spent to do so, and it wasn’t long before he’d fallen into a dreamless sleep. 

Oliver had entered the bathroom, turning on the light and the fan immediately, groaning and digging the heels of his palms into his eyes as the sudden change in light intensity hit him. He walked over to the shower and started it, not letting it warm up before he stepped inside. The cold water hit him he shivered involuntarily and his body began to relax. His mind becoming flooded with the thoughts of what had just went down in the other room. God. Barry must be so confused right now, they’d started out making love and then Oliver had just gone batshit crazy without warning. Oh god… what if he’d hurt him. Oliver’s eyes widened in horror and he was tempted to step out of the shower right then and go check on him. But something kept him rooted to his spot. He didn’t know what, but he felt himself unable to move. Unable to face Barry so soon after that encounter. He needed time to get his thoughts together or else he might do something stupid like blurt out “I want you to fuck me” Oliver sighed, the expression on his face turning into one of pain and distress as he leaned against the shower wall, he didn’t notice that he’d started crying until he noticed the water had gotten warm but his body was still shaking. He was such a mess. Why was this so hard for him to admit to Barry? It shouldn’t have been. He never had been sexually shy about anything before, and they’d been pretty adventurous in their sexual endeavors. And then his hands were moving of their own accord. Again, his mind was taking its own sweet time connecting to the rest of his body. He felt himself massaging his own fingers around his asshole as things caught up, he breathed slowly and relaxed. This felt nice. What was he so scared of? He reached for the silicone based lubricant they kept in the shower and coated his fingers with it before taking a deep breath and tracing his crack with it again. He closed his eyes, imagining that his fingers were Barry’s and slowly worked one inside.

It felt uncomfortable, and nothing like it had when Barry had done it, maybe he didn’t use enough lube? He pulled out and applied more lube, even going as far as reaching behind himself and tipping the bottle over and letting it drip down his crack as well. He then went back to his earlier movements, and yes, that did the trick. The slide in was much easier and he felt himself enjoying it more than he thought he would. He closed his eyes again and leaned against the shower wall, the warm water still pelting down his back as he began to work his finger inside himself at a faster pace. He felt his cock getting hard with every stroke, god this felt amazing. Why was he denying himself of this? He slid his finger out and re-coated himself with lube, this time experimenting with different angles and paces he felt his breathing turn into panting, and he pulled out again in a rush, applying more lube before delving in with two fingers this time, he gave a quiet but satisfied moan and bit his lip, letting his eyes fall shut as he began scissoring his fingers inside his ass. His other hand came around to his front, taking a hold of his cock and beginning to stroke and tease with the familiar ministrations he used when jerking off. He groaned, continuing to keep his noises muffled with the help of his lip between his teeth, he continued to work his ass with his fingers, finally he crooked them at a certain angle and his eyes shot open, mouth falling open in a startled gasp at the shock of pleasure that rippled through him. He whimpered softly rotating his fingers until he hit that spot again, he hissed as he sped up his movements, biting down on his lips again to keep from crying out in pleasure. His mouth forming an “O” shape as he reached his orgasm, cum spirting against the tile walls. His shoulders slumped as he came down from his high, breaths ragged as he braced himself against the wall with a hand. He sighed, that had been amazing. If only it had really been Barry doing it to him. Why was this so hard? Why was he so stubborn? 

He unhappily turned off the shower and dried off, leaving the bathroom and heading into the closet to retrieve a pair of underwear. He turned back to the bed to see Barry lying there still exposed and uncovered on his stomach, his body moving in a constant way that told Oliver he was fast asleep. He felt a pang of guilt in his chest, he had just left him here and stormed off to take care of his own frustrations. He slid into bed, trying to cause as little movement as possible so as to not wake the sleeping angel, and pulled the covers over the both of them. Despite his efforts Barry woke for a moment, mumbling a sleepy 

“Oliver?” And scooting over, wanting to be close to Oliver as he usually did, Barry sleepily threw his arms over Oliver and buried his face into his chest,  
“I love you Ollie.” He mumbled, and Oliver felt his heart break at the admission. He loved the other man too, so much… and that’s what was tearing him apart most about this situation. He loved Barry, so why was it so hard to be honest to him about this stupidly simple little thing? 

\----

Oliver stopped in front of the shop. He looked up at it, it didn’t look like much, quite run down on the outside if you asked him, but online it had said they’d carried what he was looking for, and he was hoping they did. He wanted to get in and out as fast as he could. The bell over the door chimed as he entered and he winced slightly, not that you could tell for the sunglasses over his eyes and the cap, plus, sweatshirt hood he was wearing shielded his face pretty well. 

“Hello doll, is there anything I can help you find?” a short brunette dressed in a leather corset and tight black skinny jeans and hoop earrings said as she sauntered over to him, 

“Um, I think I know what I’m looking for, but I’ll let you know if I need any help.” Oliver said, trying to make his voice sound lower than normal. He felt kind of stupid, but he didn’t want this getting out. He might not have had much to his name anymore, but he had enough. And it still would be embarrassing. He looked around and saw a sign over an aisle that read “Dildos” and with a slight blush forming on his cheeks he shoved his hands into his pockets and walked over to them. He quickly browsed through them and spotted the two he’d found online that were recommended for beginners and snatched them up. He grabbed a few different lubes and a new box of condoms on the way over to the counter. He put down his purchases and the woman from earlier gave him a knowing smile before ringing them up.

“That will be $64.55.” Jesus, Oliver thought, why were sex toys so expensive? Still he retrieved his wallet, paid with cash, and thanked her before heading out. Thankful that the bag was discrete enough. He made it back to the loft and stowed his newest purchases in a box underneath the bed and tried to put it to the back of his mind as he then headed off to the Arrow HQ to begin the rest of his day. 

\--

He got home that night frustrated, not having made any progress in the Green Arrow’s latest endeavors today and flopped onto his bed after removing his shoes. He let out a slow breath and stared up at the ceiling. He thought about calling Barry but realized that he’d just done so on the way home and hadn’t gotten an answer so he was probably busy at the moment. His mind wandered to what he’d bought earlier that day and once he began thinking about them, his mind wouldn’t rest. He pushed himself up off the bed and got down on his knees to pull the box out from underneath the bed. He put the box on top of his bed and looked over to the door, making sure it was locked. So if, by some crazy reason, someone came by unannounced they wouldn’t be able to just barge in and catch him in the act. Weather that be Barry or his sister, or Felicity, or Diggle, all of which whom had keys to the apartment. 

He lied down on the bed after pulling aside the covers and setting the toys he’d bought out. The first one being a set of different sized buttplugs, said to be good for beginners, and the second one a bright red realistic jelly silicone dildo, not quite as thick or long as Barry, but good for practice. He stared at the toys dubiously. He wanted to do this, he really did, but he was still facing that internal battle with himself over his masculinity. It was so fucking dumb, enjoying getting it up the ass made him no less of a man than any other person who identified as such, and he hated that his brain couldn’t turn off the stupid thoughts. After a few more minutes of staring off against the toys, he sighed, swallowing his pride and removing his pants. He began to palm himself through the fabric of his underwear. Closing his eyes and imagining it was Barry in front of him. He let his muscles relax and he slipped his hand underneath the underwear to feel skin on skin. He began to stroke himself, getting harder by the second, his desperation for more quickly growing and fueling his confidence to explore lower. He gave his balls a tight squeeze before snapping the waistband of his Boxer briefs and reaching down with both hands to slide them down his legs and throw them off the bed to the floor. He spread his legs and closed his eyes again. Trailing a finger down his and trailed a finger down his perineum before lightly prodding at the tight clench of his asshole. He reached over, next to himself and uncapped the lube. Pouring a generous amount onto his fingers before going back to slick up his ass. He continued to lube himself up until he simply slid inside himself without meaning to. He started with one finger, working himself up to two, scissoring in and out of himself as his breaths came out in ragged pants. He pulled his fingers out of himself again reaching for the lube. He also took a second to select the smallest buttplug and slick it up as well before drawing it down between his legs and closing his eyes as he began to gently push it inside of himself. It was a bit bigger than his two fingers, but not much, and he soon got used to the feeling after a few more times of retrieving and inserting it. God this felt so good… why had he never tried this? He repeated his earlier actions until he had the largest buttplug buried deep within himself. By now he was sweating, a hand wrapped around his cock and alternating between teasing jerks and squeezes of the base to keep himself from coming. He wanted to get to the red dildo… it was bigger than any of the buttplugs he’d used so far, and it lied on the light grey bedcovers looking innocuously big and intimidating. He let out a slow breath through his mouth before picking it up and sliding one of the condoms he’d purchased over the head and down to the base before lubing it up as well. He slowly removed the buttplug that was still inside his ass at this point and replaced it with the head of the dildo. He hissed as the thick head of the dildo stretched him open. It was so much wider than the buttplug had been… but he wanted to take it so badly. Pulling out and adding more lube he started inserting it again. This time the slide was a bit easier. It took a good ten minutes, a lot of panting, groaning and almost pulling out and reverting to just jerking himself off the rest of the way to his orgasm, but in the end, he found himself propped up against the pillows of the bed with the dildo fully sheathed inside his ass. He breathed deeply. Allowing his anus to get used to the stretch and feeling of something so deep inside. He clenched and unclenched around it, wiggling his hips experimentally feeling it shift inside him. When he finally felt brave enough to start moving it he reached around behind himself, spreading his legs even farther apart and turning on his side slightly so he didn’t have to sit on his arm and slowly retracted the dildo a few inches before sliding it back inside. He whimpered at the feeling, it felt uncomfortable… but he knew it would feel good soon. That’s what all the online columns had said. So he pushed through the discomfort, clenching his teeth and beginning to pull out and push back inside at a faster pace. The stretch soon began to feel good, awakening nerve endings in side of himself that he didn’t even know existed. He was panting and moaning now, getting braver with each thrust, the amount he retrieved before plunging back inside becoming greater and greater each time. He reached in front of himself to begin stroking his cock again, and holy fuck… that was good. He cried out loud into the quiet stillness of the apartment, the only sounds the rustle of sheets and slight creaking of the bed as he fucked himself with the toy. Now at the point where only the head of the dildo stayed inside him before he pounded it back in, he decided to change angles… and holyfuckingshit what the hell was that? His hand had come off the dildo and he realized he’d begun shaking. What the hell had that just been, it was like for a few moments his vision became white, a blinding pressure in his ass that caused an overwhelming tingling sensation to erupt and spread throughout his dick and the lower part of his stomach. It was different than the feel of impending orgasms he’d felt before, but at the same time familiar. Was that his prostate? He’d read about the stimulation of the prostate, but nothing he’d read really described what it specifically felt like, all that he’d been able to find on the matter was that it was a pleasurable and intense experience, and that had certainly been both. Panting he reached down behind himself again and closed his eyes, taking hold of the base of the dildo and beginning his previous movements again, stroking over that spot repeatedly. It felt so fucking good, he let his imagination wander, suddenly picturing Barry behind him with the dildo, Oliver looking back at him for a second after he’d hit that spot to see him smirking, before thrusting in sharply again causing Oliver to turn his head back down into the bed sheets and moan loudly

“Fuck Barry… fuck that’s so good… you’re so fucking amazing… fuck me…” he moaned. 

Thea had just unlocked the door to the loft, Roy right behind her, as soon as the door shut Roy had her pinned against it and they were kissing again. Thea giggled as Roy brushed their noses together and kissed her lips quickly as she smiled. He picked her up and encouraged her to wrap her legs around his waist, the two of them making their way over to the couch in a slightly buzzed haze. Roy went to work kissing down her neck after he got her lied down on her back. They laughed as Roy brushed over a spot lightly with his lips that he knew Thea was ticklish at.  
“Thea Queen… you are beautiful.” Roy whispered, as he stretched himself back up to lean over her face and kiss her lips again. The two shifted into a more comfortable position and continued their kissing. 

“Do you wanna take this to my room?” Thea asked, Roy nodded and the two stood up, heading towards the hallway, suddenly they heard a thump, and stopped in their tracks. A moan followed and the two turned to each other, eyes widening in shock. Thea looked over to the kitchenettes table, just now seeing Oliver’s jacket lying precariously on top of it. Well it seemed that she and Roy weren’t the only ones who’d had the same idea tonight. Another moan was heard and Thea said, 

“Um… maybe we should go…” Roy nodded his head vigorously and the two hurriedly rushed to the door, they were about to open it when they heard a loud cry of 

“Holy fuck, Barry, fuck me… right there! Yes, fuck, harder, fuck me harder!!!” Roy could’ve sworn that Thea’s eyes widened to the size of golf balls as a blush burned her cheeks. She fumbled with the doorknob and mumbled a quiet 

“Oh my god… that was the last thing in life I ever needed to hear…let’s get out of here… now.” And Roy couldn’t agree more, he was sure his cheeks were even a bit pink now, rethinking over what they’d just heard. He’d never, ever, in a million years have taken Oliver to be on the receiving end of things… and why the hell was he even thinking of this anyway? The two of them hurriedly made their way down to the elevator and Roy shook his head to clear his thoughts. Next time they were calling first.

Oliver pounded the dildo into himself, at this point not being able to keep quiet, his fantasy becoming even more vivid, he could swear he could feel Barry’s hand rubbing at his hip as he continued to thrust the dildo into him… he grasped his dick in his other hand and began jerking it roughly while pressing the dildo in deeper than he had before, over and over onto that same spot until he saw stars, he came in spurts with a choked off cry of ecstasy. Pulling the toy out of himself and curling into a shaking ball of pleasure as the intensity of the orgasm rippled through him. When he finally calmed down he didn’t even have the energy to get up and wash himself off, deciding that he’d just change the sheets, shower, and put away everything in the morning, falling into a fitful much needed slumber. 

\----

Oliver had gotten into a routine of using his new toys every night when he got home and wasn’t bone tired the following three weeks. He’d seen Barry a few times since he bought them. The two had gone out to lunch a few times, stayed together at the club, joined at the hip, during the party he’d thrown for Laurel’s birthday, and even managed to get in a few make out sessions in the loft after sharing a dinner. Barry hadn’t been able to spend the night though, and Oliver was honestly grateful for it. They hadn’t seen each other in a week and hadn’t really had any contact other than the occasional good morning good night, and I love you text message, so Oliver was surprised when Barry showed up three days before their two year anniversary with a duffel bag on the doorstep of his loft, a wide dopey grin spread across his face, before announcing that he would be able to stay in Starling for the next four days. He gave a chaste peck to Oliver’s lips and let himself into the Loft. Unceremoniously dropping his bag on next to the couch and throwing himself on, it before patting the seat beside him and quipping, 

“Ollie, why are you standing there with your jaw on the floor, is that really how you greet me after a whole week?” Oliver snapped out of his surprise and closed the door before going over to Barry and sitting beside him. “Is something wrong? Should I have called first? I just really wanted to surprise you…” Barry said, his expression turning into one of concern as he tilted his head and tried to read the faraway look in Oliver’s eyes. He reached forward and placed a hand over Oliver’s which was currently lying on his own thigh. 

Oliver’s eyes slowly drifted to Barry and he blinked shaking his head again before letting a tentative smile form on his face as he turned his hand over to interlock his and Barry’s fingers together and squeeze. 

“Sorry, I was just thinking… no, nothing’s wrong, I’m just surprised… that’s all. How long are you staying again?” 

“Four days,” Barry grinned, and Oliver couldn’t help but grin back. “And Felicity and Digg said that you guys weren’t in the middle of anything serious right now so I took the liberty of telling them that you wouldn’t be in and that they could take these four days to relax as well. I hope you don’t mind… but it’s our two year anniversary and I didn’t want any… distractions…” Barry said, leaning closer to Oliver so that their faces were inches apart. Oliver’s eyes were locked on his, he could feel his warm breath fan over his lips as Oliver spoke his next words, 

“But what about the Flash, will Central be okay without him?” 

“I think so, S.T.A.R. Labs has come a long way in aiding the Police with things that will help them take down metas. Joe said he’d call if they absolutely needed anything. And Cold owed me a favor, and if there’s one thing he does know how to do, it’s keep a code of honor when it comes to owing people things. I did save his life again recently. So he gave me his word that he wouldn’t pull any heists, and he’d try to keep the rest of his rouges from pulling any as well for the next four days, besides, I think Lisa and Cisco are going off somewhere together, and he doesn’t like pulling jobs without her anyway,” 

“And you trust him?” Oliver asked. 

“Not really, but enough that I’m willing to take a chance, like I said, Joe promised to call and I can get there pretty fast if anything serious seems to be brewing.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Ollie… I never get to be selfish… and after so long, my team and my family have finally managed to convince me to do this one thing for myself. I don’t want to think about it too much, if something happens, we’ll deal with it… I just want to spend time with you now… and not think of our alter egos… I just want to be Barry Allen and have you be Oliver Queen for now? Do you think we can try that? For just a little while?” 

Oliver sighed and then smiled. “I guess so…” Barry smiled and leaned forward to press a long kiss to Oliver’s lips. They pulled away and Barry whispered 

“I missed you…” 

“Missed you too…” 

“Are you hungry?” 

“I’m always hungry… but right now I want something else…” His eyes darkened, 

“But you just ran here… don’t you need something before we…”  


“I ate some of those energy bars before I left and Cisco and Caitlin have found a way to make them time released…. So I won’t really anything for at least another few hours…” Barry said, crowding into Oliver’s space and practically climbing onto his lap before capturing Oliver’s lips in a bruising, passionate, kiss. Oliver let one of his hands come up to tangle in Barry’s hair as the other pressed firmly into the small of his back, holding him in place and allowing their hips to rock against each other as they kissed. Barry’s hands were clutching Oliver’s face as the two continued to kiss. Oliver let his hand come down to cup Barry’s ass, and he hoisted him up against him, still not breaking the kiss as he steadied himself and began to stand up. 

“Hold on…” he breathed, before going back to kissing him and walked them down the hall into his bedroom, Barry still clinging to him with his legs wrapped around him. “Wanna fuck you.” Oliver said, after he lied Barry down on the bed. “Wanna be inside you… wanna feel you around my dick…” Oliver said as he began to kiss every inch of skin he could reach on Barry. “Maybe you can ride me… or maybe I’ll hold your hands above your head and pound into you as I watch your pretty face scrunch up in ecstasy… or maybe I’ll pick you up again, shove you back against the wall and fuck you with your legs around my waist,…” Oliver kissed up his jaw, stopping to suck at his earlobe and whisper huskily, “Or maybe… just maybe… I’ll open those curtains, pick you up, and fuck you against that giant glass window over there… looking out over this city… your beautiful body pressed up against the glass… on display…” 

Barry moaned, “God yes… please… just take me… I don’t care where… just want you inside me… fuck you feel so good inside me.” Barry was writhing underneath him. 

“Why don’t you do your thing and get us both naked?” He smiled, letting Barry up, Barry’s head was spinning and he blinked blearily before a flash of light went through the room and moments later the two of them were naked, Barry pulling Oliver back down to the bed with him again. His legs wrapped wantonly around Oliver and his hips bucking up against the older man, their hard members rubbing up against each other as well. 

“Fuck me Ollie… fuck me.” Barry whined, and Oliver growled, 

“I’m gonna fuck you against that window, and then I’m gonna fuck you into this mattress, you’re gonna cum more than you’ve ever had in your entire life… and you’re not gonna touch yourself while I do it. Otherwise I’ll have to get out the cock ring…” Barry moaned loudly and bucked up aganst Oliver again in agreement. 

“Yes… anything… anything you want.” He whimpered. Oliver pulled himself away from Barry to draw the curtains aside, the room immediately being illuminated with the lights from the city at night. Oliver came back over to Barry and picked him up, the two kissed and groped each other as they made the short trek to the window, Oliver didn’t waste a moment, turning Barry around and pushing him against the glass.

“You lube yourself up?” He asked into Barry’s ear. 

“Yeah… and you too.” Barry panted. Oliver took a hold of his cock and was surprised to see that yes, Barry had in fact put a condom on him and lubed him up. 

“Good.” Oliver said and he let out a groan as he took his cock in his hand and guided it to Barry’s asshole. Pressing into the tight heat and growling. Barry cried out. His hands nails silently scratching against the cool glass as Oliver didn’t wait to burry himself all the way inside. 

“You gonna scream for me baby?” Oliver asked,

“Yes…” Barry said breathlessly. And that was all Oliver needed to hear, he began a ruthless pace of fucking in and out of Barry, groaning and moaning, flesh slapping against flesh in a crude and loud manner. 

“So fucking tight… love your ass so much… love how you feel around my cock… best feeling in the whole fucking world… you’re so good for me baby… gonna make you cum so fucking hard.” Oliver said in a gruff voice, his thrusts getting deeper with each sentence.  
“Oh god, yes, Ollie, please… fuck… yes… right there… your cock is huge… love it so much. Don’t want you to ever stop fucking me…” Barry gasped as Oliver moved and began to hit his prostate over and over again. “Oh shit… oh my fuck… god… harder… I’m almost there… you’re gonna make me cum against this window… is that what you want? Do you want me to blow my load all over this window for everyone to see?” Barry babbled whatever came to his mind first. 

Oliver grunted and gripped Barry’s hips, thrusting harder, he was going to make Barry cum against this window and he was going to love it when his ass clenched around his dick… and then he was going to fuck Barry into the bed, loving the feeling of how deep he could go and how crazy his dick made Barry… because that was his job… his job was to make Barry scream and fall apart underneath him… and he was not going to fail. Barry’s voice tapered off into high pitched whines and sobs, small “ohs” being thrown in every so often, he grinded back onto Oliver’s cock and with one last thrust he felt himself coming apart at the seams, crying Oliver’s name in pure exhilaration. His own dick twitching and erupting it’s release against the window thickly. 

“Fuck yes…” Oliver said, he didn’t give Barry a moment to recover, but he and Barry both knew it was better the next time that way, even if it was slightly uncomfortable at first… the second orgasm was even more intense and the one after that was even more mind-blowing. The two had gotten to three orgasms in a row with Barry before, but Barry was pretty sure he could go for four and even five. He brought the younger man back over to the bed and lied him down on his front, giving Barry a moment to get himself situated. Barry moaned and began to thrust back against him when he was ready for more and Oliver once again took a hold of his hips and began to bulldoze back into him. Oliver continued to spout filth about how much he loved fucking Barry until the younger man was nothing but putty beneath him. Oliver barely managed to hold off through Barry’s second orgasm, and as he reached around to grab Barry’s dick, Oliver reached his first, and Barry reached his third, in unison. Oliver pulled out of Barry, but he wasn’t done yet. He slapped Barry’s ass once, causing him to cry out and keen, and cant his hips up so that his ass was on display. Oliver got behind him and rimmed and fingered him through two more orgasms before Barry was shuddering and pawing at Oliver and telling him that he was spent. The two curled up with each other and Oliver fell asleep with the younger male in his arms, feeling a since of accomplishment and pride. Maybe he was finally over this stupid questioning bottom phase.


	2. Make All My Screws Come Loose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a bit of angst between the two, they talk, and Oliver finally gives into his desires.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has more plot, and angst, but don’t worry, it isn’t light on the smut either. ;) enjoy thanks for all the wonderful reviews on the last one. I literally smiled so wide I made my mouth hurt. 
> 
> There also sometimes tend to be little inconsistencies in my stories, like i forget if a character has undressed or not, or other small things, if you notice any please leave me a comment. I haven't re-read this chapter all the way through, I'm too tired and like all of my work, it's not been edited by anyone but myself, and I don't tend to catch all things, so please don't hesitate to politely tell me if you notice that there's something wrong, I really do appreciate it!

Oliver and Barry had spent the last two days completely wrapped up in each other, cuddles, dates, lazy mornings, late nights, and plenty more sex. Oliver had managed to push the thoughts of Barry fucking him to the back of his mind. The two had sex over pretty much every surface in the loft. Through each encounter Oliver would constantly babble filthy comments about being inside Barry. Barry found it ridiculously hot, if not slightly odd, Oliver wasn’t often this vocal in bed, sure he made noise, but not usually this much. It was usually him who had the problem with dirty babbling. But he wasn’t going to complain. 

Their frequent intimate encounters had started to become ridiculous. It had only been two days and Barry couldn’t count how many times Oliver had fucked him or made love to him over the past 48 hours. It wasn’t like all they’d done was stay in the house and have sex, they’d gone to a movie, spent a good few hours at a local carnival, worked out at Oliver’s self-made gym/warehouse, taken a few walks in the nearby park, and even had a picnic. Yet it seemed whenever they weren’t out in public, or sleeping, Oliver was constantly on him, touching him, kissing him, close to him, driving him crazy until the two ended up horizontal again… or sometimes vertical… it just depended on the place. They’d done it in the shower, on the floor of the bedroom, against the wall of the bedroom and of the hall, on the floor of the living room in front of the fire, on the sofa, in the recliner, hell even once at the kitchen table when Oliver had convinced him to ride him while they ate. Whatever possessed him to agree to that he didn’t remember, but it had happened. It was as if Oliver had turned into a sexual fiend. How did someone without superpowers even get it up that many times in two days? Barry hadn’t the slightest clue. Currently he was lying awake in bed, looking at the ceiling in silence. The two had just finished yet another intense round of lovemaking and Oliver had finally calmed down enough to sleep. The next day was their two year anniversary, and Barry was hoping to do something besides spend the whole day in bed if he was honest. 

He awoke the next morning to someone kissing his neck. That someone obviously being Oliver. He groaned in appreciation arching his neck in an invitation for Oliver to keep going. Oliver let out a throaty chuckle and did just that, allowing his stubble to gently run over the sensitive skin of Barry’s neck and drive him wild. Oliver came around to press a kiss to his lips and Barry sighed happily when the older man pulled away, an expression of adoration and love directed straight at him.

“Happy two year anniversary,” Barry said, they'd been officially dating for over two years now. 

“Happy two year anniversary,” Oliver parroted back, a grin spreading across his lips. Barry felt Oliver slowly begin to grind their morning wood together. Causing a sharp intake of breath to be elicited from his own lips. 

“Ollie… do we have to?” 

“Do you not want to?” Oliver said, in a deep and throaty voice, his lips coming to brush against Barry’s ear.

“Alright… but one round… then I want food.” Oliver smiled and reached his hand down between their stomachs, 

“Spread your legs for me babe,” Oliver said, and Barry did as asked, moaning when he felt a hand wrap around their dicks and stroke slowly. 

“Your ass too sore for me to fuck?” 

“Mhmm… not if you go slow…” Barry said and Oliver nodded, fumbling with the bottle of lube Barry hadn’t realized he was holding, Oliver made quick work of slicking himself up before pressing inside the younger man underneath him. They rocked together slowly, this had been the gentlest sex they’d had in a while. Oliver’s face tucked into the crook of Barry’s neck as he mouthed at sensitive skin. Barry’s arms came to slide around Oliver, Barry moaned and took a hold of his ass cheeks encouraging him to move a bit deeper. He heard Oliver’s breath hitch as he squeezed and his thrusts stutter to an abrupt stop. It was as if Oliver was frozen above him and for a moment he became a bit worried, 

“Ollie?” He whispered, afraid of breaking the tender moment they’d created. Oliver seemed to snap out of whatever it was and he went back to mouthing at Barry’s neck. 

“You feel so good today.” Oliver said. 

“So do you…” Barry said. And gave another squeeze to Oliver’s ass. Oliver faltered again before stuttering out 

“Can you… um… not squeeze my butt?” He said, his voice coming out small, Barry found the request slightly odd, because he’d never complained before, maybe Oliver had bruised it or something, he didn’t know, and at the moment he couldn’t see, he let his hands fall to the bed covers again though and whispered a soft, 

“Sure, didn’t know it bothered you.” 

“No… it’s just…” Oliver started, but seemingly losing his train of thought and falling silent again. Why did Barry have to go and do that? The first time he’d managed to brush it off and keep going but the second time, fuck… he was gone… all the thoughts he’d managed to repress for the last few days popped into his head again and this time no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t make them go away. Barry was getting closer to the edge, he could feel it, his ass beginning to clench around him tightly. Oliver groaned and began thrusting his hips a bit faster. Why did Barry have to do this to him… he continued thrusting until he heard Barry let out a whimper and cum between them, with a few last thrusts inside Barry Oliver came as well before pulling out and rolling off of him. He got out of bed without a word and retreated to the bathroom like he’d done a few nights before. This time Barry managed to pull himself out of bed and join Oliver, opening the door quietly to hear a frustrated grunt and a few muttered curse words. 

“Will you get out of my head?!” He heard Oliver growl, Barry’s brow furrowed in confusion, what was Oliver talking about? Oliver growled angrily to the thoughts in his head. Great he was talking to himself now. He shook his head and once again tried to push the thoughts away with no success. “God, why can’t I just be with him without all these other feelings?!” He exclaimed in a whisper, trying not to be too loud. Barry’s curiosity was peaked. He stood still, not wanting to move or alert Oliver of his presence, “Why can’t things just go back to the way they were?” He heard Oliver mutter softly. Now that was odd. Barry had a lot of questions, but he felt bad now for eavesdropping. Hopefully Oliver would come to him in time with whatever was bothering him, he couldn’t help but feel unsettled by the words… it almost sounded like there was… someone else. But no… there couldn’t be, Oliver had looked so genuine as he’d said Happy Anniversary to him that morning. Barry shook his head, trying not to worry too much, this was supposed to be a good day, and damn if he wasn’t going to try to make it the best anniversary ever now that these new thoughts had been planted in his head. Oliver was his. And he wasn’t about to let him go without showing him what he’d be missing. 

He opened the shower curtain and said, “Is it ok if I join you?” He watched Oliver give a little surprised jump before a smile formed on his lips and he said 

“Yeah, sorry, I didn’t offer.” 

\----

As he dried off Oliver couldn’t help but wonder how much Barry had heard of the conversation he’d had with himself in the shower, he hadn’t even heard the door open, how long had Barry been standing there? He shook his head trying to will these new worries along with all the other thoughts to the back of his mind. It was their two year anniversary and they had a brunch reservation to make it to. 

\----

Oliver had seemed to be on edge all day. He may have thought he’d been doing a good job of hiding it, but Barry was seeing straight through the façade. The two had decided to take a walk in the park, they were currently simply enjoying the company of each other, walking along the quiet path. Oliver would occasionally pipe up and ask a question, but not anything that required more than answers containing a few short sentences. They walked up a hill and came to the main area of the park, a family was having a picnic underneath the shade of a tree, a few kids were running around playing tag, a couple was making out on a bench, and another group was playing Frisbee with their dog. Across the way a pavilion sat with the melodic sounds of a string quartet pouring out of it. The sun beat down on them, Barry felt Oliver tentatively reach over and take his hand, he looked over to meet his eyes and a small smile formed on his face, 

“Do you want to dance?” Oliver asked. Motioning with his head towards the pavilion. Barry was no dancer, but the sweetness of the suggestion made him say yes. Oliver lead Barry over to where the String quartet could be heard louder and then faced him, a small smile on his lips he bowed exaggeratedly causing a small huff of laughter to come from Barry before extending his hand again. The two swayed softly, Barry’s eyes locked on Oliver as he took the lead. His feet eventually getting a hold of the movements as Oliver slowly guided him and whispered the tempo between them. When the song stopped Oliver stopped as well, letting go of Barry’s hands awkwardly and chuckling lightly, 

“Well that was fun, I must say Mr. Allen, your footwork has improved tremendously since the time you and Felicity danced at that party I threw for my mother.” Barry blushed at the memory and Oliver took his hand. “What do you think of stopping for ice cream before we go home and change for our Dinner reservations tonight?” Barry’s smile widened and he nodded eagerly. Slipping his hand into the back pocket of Oliver’s jeans and pulling him close to press a kiss to his lips. The kiss was odd though, Oliver seemed slightly caught off guard, and his lips didn’t corporate as they normally would have. Barry pulled away and tried not to think of it too much, a beat of silence, and then he removed his hand from Oliver’s back pocket. 

“So, about that ice cream you suggested?” Oliver nodded and turned to start walking again. The awkwardness of earlier had seemed to dissipate as they danced, but after the kiss as they began walking, it returned, and Barry was quite frankly annoyed. What the hell was going on with Oliver? He was all smiles and sweetness one second and then the next he was awkward and standoffish again. 

Oliver had tensed when he felt Barry’s hand at his ass again… even through the clothes his mind was suddenly flooded with the thoughts again and he was distracted. He managed to kiss back though and hoped that he didn’t do too bad of a job, and when Barry had pulled away and reminded him of the ice cream, he took it as a welcome distraction and headed off down the path that led the way out of the park.

\-----  
The rest of the day seemed to go a bit smoother thank goodness. When they got home they decided to cuddle on the couch and this time Oliver didn’t try to induce any sexual contact. Simply holding him close and pressing kisses into his hair every so often as they watched some comedy that Oliver had picked out. Barry wasn’t particularly interested in it, but at least Oliver wasn’t being weird anymore. Barry had sped his way through putting his suit on and was now in the bathroom messing with his hair as Oliver finished getting ready in the other room. 

“Bar-wow.” Oliver said as he knocked on the bathroom door. And noticed Barry’s outfit and reflection in the mirror. Barry turned to look at him, 

“What?” he asked, Oliver shook his head and seemed to trip over his words. 

“You, you just… you look amazing.” Oliver finally settled on. Barry was wearing a deep navy suit, the pants slightly tighter than they probably should’ve been, but Oliver wasn’t complaining. His shirt, which was tucked in was a light powder blue and the tie he wore with it was navy as well. His hair was swept up out of his face to frame his angelic features. Barry blushed at the complement and turned back to the sink to remove his glasses and put his contacts in. for some weird reason, although everything else had seemed to heal itself in the accident, his vision had still remained slightly impaired. He didn’t mind that much though. It made him feel normal. 

"I'm almost done," Barry said, slipping off his glasses, if he'd been able to see he would've noticed Oliver's slight downturn of his lips. Oliver loved seeing Barry in his glasses, he thought it was one of the most adorable sights in the entire world, he'd tried to get him to go out in public with them forever, but he'd never had any success, and tonight he wasn't in the mood to push so he simply waited until Barry was finished putting his contacts in before smiling back at him in the mirror brightly. 

The two headed out of the loft and down to the car waiting for them on the street. Oliver held the door for Barry and Barry slid inside, Oliver did the same and when he was seated with the door closed he scooted closer to Barry and clasped their hands together. Barry let his head fall onto Oliver’s shoulder and the two rode to the restaurant in silence. They got out and headed into the restaurant about 20 minutes later. They were seated in a round booth in a discreet corner of the restaurant, thighs pressed together as they looked over the wine menu together. Once they’d placed their orders the two fell into another awkward silence. Barry scratched the back of his head and tried to think of something to say, they’d really managed to talk about everything though throughout the past few days, he sighed and instead rested his head on Oliver’s shoulder, wrapping an arm around the older man’s waist. Oliver tensed visibly though and it suddenly occurred to Barry that Oliver had been doing that all day whenever he touched his back… was Oliver hurt? He furrowed his brow, and removed his head from Oliver’s shoulder 

“Ollie?” Oliver didn’t respond, “Ollie?” Barry said again. 

God why couldn’t he stop tensing up every time Barry touched his back… they were in public, he wasn’t going to just slide his hand down the back of his pants and shove his fingers in his ass… he had nothing to be worried about, it’s not like Barry wouldn’t do that anyway even if they weren’t in public, so why the hell was he so on edge? 

“Oliver!” Barry finally said louder than before, Oliver jumped, had Barry been talking to him? 

“Shit, were you talking?” Oliver said, Barry looked at him annoyed and rolled his eyes. 

“What’s going on with you?” Barry asked, scooting away from him and turning to look at him, crossing his arms. 

“What do you mean?” Oliver asked, trying to laugh it off. But Barry was having none of it and he gave Oliver an unimpressed look.

“Don’t try to undermine me, I’m not stupid, I know you enough to know when somethings wrong, so what’s going on? This is our two year anniversary, this is supposed to be a good day, and you can’t even pay attention to me, what’s wrong? Am I boring you? Is there someone else? Is that what that whole “Why can’t I just be with him without all these other feelings” about? Is there someone else, because if there is then be honest with me, I can take it,” Barry’s voice was rising in volume and his tone was becoming more spiteful, 

“Barry… calm down… please…” 

“Don’t tell me to calm down, how am I supposed to calm down when I could be losing you?!”

“Barry do we have to do this here? Please, I want to talk to you… I swear I can explain… but… not here…” Barry huffed out an angry “fine” before slumping back against the booth and taking out his phone. Oliver sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, this was worse than he thought, he thought he was being careful, but he should’ve known he’d be more transparent to Barry now. Fuck… he was getting a migraine… this was the last thing he needed right now. Their food came about twenty minutes after the whole ordeal. They’d sat in silence, Barry ignoring Oliver and instead focusing on playing Smash Hit on his phone. When their food came Barry angrily stabbed at it and ate it quickly, he hadn’t even glanced towards Oliver since their fight earlier. Oliver put his fork down, tired of the silence and sighed. He reached for Barry’s hand, the one that was on the table and not being used to thumb through his phone. Barry was about to jerk away but Oliver gripped it tighter. 

“You know there could never be anyone else right? You’re the only one for me these days…” Barry rolled his eyes, “I’m serious… I don’t want anyone besides you.” Barry raised his eyebrows and gave him a pointed look, “Look, it’s not you…” Barry rolled his eyes so hard that he felt like they might just roll out of his head, 

“Are you fucking serious right now? You’re gonna give me the “it’s not you it’s me speech?”

“Barry… please… just let me talk.” Barry sighed and looked at Oliver, “Talk, you have one minute before I hightail it out of here, I’ve had it up to here with your bullshit today.” 

“Barry, this is something I can’t really talk to you about here… it’s more a private matter… but there’s nothing wrong with you, you haven’t done anything wrong, at least not anything serious… I’ve just… been having a hard time with some feelings lately and I need to sort through them.” 

“That’s very vague Oliver… points for nothing.” Barry rolled his eyes and began to slide out of the booth. 

“Barry please…” Oliver was becoming desperate, he didn’t know what to say to keep Barry from leaving, he was getting farther away by the second. “Barry please…” His voice cracked, and that seemed to stop Barry in his tracks. Barry turned back to him, an annoyed look still on his face but with obvious concern filtering through. 

“I really can’t tell you what’s going on right now, it’s not exactly appropriate for dinner conversation, so can you please… just let me finish eating and we can go back to the loft and I swear I’ll tell you everything when we get back… just please… don’t leave.” Barry had never heard Oliver like this before. Something must really be bothering him. With a sigh, he relented, taking the few steps back over to their table and sliding back into the booth. Oliver felt relief course through him in waves as Barry sat down next to him and took his hand, locking their fingers together. Everything was going to be ok… Barry wasn’t leaving… he’d have a chance to explain. The two finished their dinner in silence, but this time it wasn’t a tense silence, instead a more comfortable one that consisted of Barry leaning against Oliver and tracing soothing patterns into his thigh, or the back of his hand, or skirting his fingers up and down the arm Oliver wasn’t using to eat. Little touches, just to reassure him that he was still there. After they paid, they stood up, their arms locking as they headed back to the entrance of the building. The car was waiting outside and once again Oliver held the door open as Barry slipped inside. On the ride back, Barry could tell Oliver was tense, and he did his best to try to calm him down. If only he knew that his touches were only putting Oliver more on edge… Oliver didn’t have the heart to tell him to stop though. When they pulled up to the building that the loft was in Oliver slid out first, thanking the driver and not letting go of Barry’s hand as they made their way through the doors and over to the elevator. The ride up didn’t take long and when they go to the top floor they got off, Oliver unlocked the door to the loft and let Barry in first. He put his keys down on the kitchen table and reached up to loosen his tie. The silence in the apartment was far too loud. At the moment he had his back turned to Barry and he could feel the younger man’s eyes on him. His heart was pounding and his thoughts were a jumbled mess. He couldn’t put this off forever though and he knew it. He gathered all of his strength and turned to look at Barry. 

“So, you said we could talk…” Barry raised an eyebrow and gestured towards the couch. Oliver nodded stiffly and went to take a seat. Oliver couldn’t meet Barry’s eyes once he sat down. Barry reached for his hand again and turned his body towards Oliver, taking his hand like he’d done in the restaurant and saying in a calm voice, 

“I’m sorry for my outburst back there… it was inappropriate and uncalled for. But Ollie, I’m worried about you… I just want you to talk to me… you can tell me anything you know that right? His thumb began to rub gentle circles into the back of Oliver’s hand. “Absolutely anything at all… so whenever you’re ready…” Barry trailed off leaving the rest of the conversation to continue when Oliver was ready for it to. But the words that came out of Oliver’s mouth next weren’t what he expected. 

“Barry… I need you to kiss me…” Barry looked at him confused. “Please… I swear I’ll tell you everything I just need you to kiss me.” Barry was getting frustrated again but he shoved those feelings away, if this would ease Oliver’s mind he’d do it. He just wanted to know what was going on. He leaned forward and captured Oliver’s lips with his own, Oliver kissed back with passion. Barry felt Oliver’s hands fist into the front of his suit as he pulled him downwards on top of him, not breaking the kiss. Oliver let go for a moment, fumbling with something between him before grabbing onto him again, taking one of his hands and placing it on his chest, undoing one of the buttons and encouraging him to do the same, Barry started to, drunk off the endless stream of passionate kisses. Oliver was now lying against the arm of the couch, propped up so that Barry was over top of him, working on removing his shirt. Oliver felt the tears forming in his eyes, god he just wanted Barry to understand already… did he really have to say it out loud? He reached for one of Barry’s hands to pull it away from where he was undoing his shirt and guided it down to rest on his crotch. He was already beginning to get hard. Barry pulled away as soon as he felt Oliver’s hardness. 

“Wait- wait… no… we can’t do this… you said we could talk so talk. I said I’d kiss you not that we could have sex.” Oliver felt like crying at this point. He covered his eyes with his arm and whimpered. Barry was looking down at him confused. 

“I need you to fuck me…” He said quietly. 

“What?” Barry asked. Not quite believing what he’d just heard. 

“I need you to fuck me… that’s what the problem is.” Barry gave him the most bewildered expression and sat there in stunned silence. Oliver hadn’t noticed the look yet though due to the fact that an arm was still thrown across his face. Barry reached foreword and moved the arm away from Oliver’s eyes, and finally found the voice to speak. 

“Excuse me? Do you mind repeating that once more?” And Oliver was gone. He pushed Barry off of him and turned away from the younger man, burring his face in his hands and trying to muffle the sobs that were now wracking his body. 

“I said I want you… to fuck me…” he barely managed to get the words out considering the state of disarray he was in. Barry couldn’t hear what he was saying his words muffled by both the sobs and his hands. He got down on his knees in front of the older man, placing his hands on Oliver’s knees and rubbing gently. 

“Oliver… look at me baby. I’m sorry but I don’t think I understand. What’s wrong?” Oliver pulled his hands away from his face, it was now red and blotchy from shame and tears. 

“What is there to misunderstand?! I want you, to fuck me, in the ass.” He bit out. 

“Y-you do?” Barry said, his eyes widening as the words Oliver had just said sunk in, he was feeling completely lost right now. 

“Do I look like I’m joking?” Oliver said, throwing his arms out and giving a humorless laugh. “God…” Oliver roughly wiped the tears from his eyes and ran a hand down his face. 

“Hey, calm down… it’s ok… what are you so upset about?” Oliver gave another dry chuckle, trying to find the right words, he couldn’t think of anything that wasn’t offensive to Barry though. Barry waited penitently for an answer, he watched as Oliver would move his mouth, trying to form words, but no sound would come out. He could tell the older man was getting overwhelmed so he spoke up again, 

“Take your time, remember you can tell me anything…” 

“I-It’s I don’t know how to explain it. I just I want you… I’ve always been the one in our relationship who… I mean… I just… fuck… I don’t know how to word this without it being offensive… I just… I’ve never…” Oliver was at a loss for words. And with the words “I never” things began to fall into place for Barry. 

“Ollie, are you nervous about bottoming? Is that what this whole thing was about?” 

“Well kind of… maybe a little bit… but it’s more… I mean, in our relationship since the very beginning, you’ve always seen me as this big, strong, guy, who was never afraid to take on danger… a dominant kind of guy who knows what I want and will stop at nothing to get it… you know? And I just… I didn’t want you to see me as any less… if I was willing to… give up some of that control… I just… I don’t want to be weak to you… I always want to be the guy who can be strong for you and who you can count on to lean on.” 

“Oliver, do you see me as being weak when I give up control to you?” Oliver’s eyes widened, 

“No… jesus, no see this is what I was worried about, I didn’t want to offend you, I don’t see you as weak at all, in fact, I think it takes a lot for someone to give up control to another person, it shows trust and… trust requires strength and endurance, you have to be strong to be able to feel that vulnerable… I think you’re incredibly strong… God what’s wrong with me?” Oliver said, trying to make since in his ramble to redeem himself, a tiny smile was playing at Barry’s lips, 

“Then why would I feel any less about you doing the same thing?” Barry asked, Oliver had just contradicted himself on so many levels, what the hell was going through that brain of his? “By the way, I wasn’t offended, I knew what you meant. And Ollie, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you.” Oliver breathed a sigh of relief, trying to take in all that Barry had just said to him. “How long have you been feeling like this though?” Barry asked. Oliver tried to think back on it… it was at least a month now…

“I’m not exactly sure…” Oliver said. “Since you fingered me when we were fucking that night a while ago.” Barry thought back on things, and wow, that was at least a month ago, Oliver had been hiding this from him this whole time, they were really going to need to work on their communication after this. 

“Well, that’s a long time… Before we do this… I need you to promise me something… actually a few somethings… first… next time somethings bothering you like this you come and talk to me right away, second, if at any time during this you want to stop, or if I’m too rough, or go too fast, you tell me, immediately, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I hurt you. And third, you will never be weak in my eyes, you are an amazing man Oliver, you’ve endured more in your life than anyone should have to, and you’ve come out of it all a better man. A man that I will always be proud to say that I love.” Oliver’s eyes were getting misty again and he felt his throat tightening, he surged forward and forced out a rushed, “I love you so much” before pressing their lips together once again. 

This time surrendering to Barry’s control. He let him stand up and loom over him, Barry’s eyes never left his as they parted and Barry gently pushed Oliver back into the couch, trailing his hands down his chest to where he’d stopped unbuttoning the older man’s shirt earlier and beginning to start again. He helped Oliver out of his jacket before climbing into his lap and slowly pushing the shirt down his arms to let it pool around his wrists which were at his side, leaning in for another kiss as he gently slid the fabric from both of Oliver’s hands, and then brought both of them up to rest on each of hips. They parted again, noses brushing, in that moment Barry could’ve counted the number of eyelashes Oliver had on each eye if he’d wanted to, they were so close. He breathed a quiet “I love you,” between them again and saw Oliver’s lips quirk up into a smile.  
“I love you.” Oliver said, 

“Do you want to take this to the bedroom?” 

“Yes…” Oliver said. And Barry climbed off of him, standing up and taking one of Oliver’s hands in his, guiding him to their bedroom. When they got to the threshold of the door Barry turned to Oliver kissing him again,

“Go on and lie down on the bed honey, I’ll get the stuff we need.” Oliver blushed at the endearment, but obeyed and walked over to the bed lying down and trying to get comfortable. Oliver heard the sink running and a few cabinets in the bathroom opening and closing before Barry emerged and made his way back over to him. Barry dropped the lube and condoms on the bed before toeing off his shoes and crawling up to Oliver. Oliver opened his legs to make room for Barry and Barry settled himself between them, pressing another kiss to his lips before softly whispering “try to relax… things will be so much better if you can relax,” Barry continued to just kiss him for a while, one of his hands running soothingly through what little hair Oliver did have and the other running down and up his arm, taking time to slowly trace the muscle of his bicep each time, Oliver felt himself slowly relaxing. His head sinking into the pillows behind him and body becoming lax. Barry was taking times alternating between kissing his lips, and other various places above his shoulders. 

“Bar?” Oliver said, 

“Hmm?” 

“I think I’m ready for more.” Oliver tells him, Barry nods and comes right up to his ear to whisper, 

“Okay, remember you can tell me to stop any time if you want.” His hand reached between the two of them to begin palming at his erection. Oliver moaned and pressed himself farther into the pillows. 

“Does that feel good?” Barry asked, 

“Yes… more… please.” Oliver said. Barry smiled and began trailing kisses down Oliver’s neck and chest, he came to his fly and slowly un-did it. Before taking his time gently sliding the pants down Oliver’s legs, he folded them, because for some reason Oliver had some crazy thing that had to do with his pants not being wrinkled… ever. And set them at the end of the bed before coming back over to the older man and kissing up his right leg, he started at his ankle, trailing soft kisses up his calf, up to the side of his knee before continuing to trail them up his thigh. Oliver was breathing heavily, god, Barry was being so careful… so gentle with him… and his heart warmed at how loved he felt. He palmed his bulge once again when he reached it, 

“You want me to touch you sweetheart?” Barry asked. And Oliver nodded. Barry slowly slid his hands into the briefs Oliver wore and gripped his erection, stroking it lightly, Oliver moaned softly and thrust into his hand. Barry got down to eye level with the older man’s cock, Oliver could feel his hot breath fanning over him even through the briefs and he said 

“Wait.” Barry immediately stopped what he was doing and looked at Oliver with concern in his eyes. 

“You didn’t do anything wrong or hurt me, don’t worry… it’s just… I just… I really need to feel you inside me… like now… so can we skip the blowjob for now? Don’t get me wrong you give marvelous head, and I’ll blow you if you want me to, but I don’t really want that right now… done to myself I mean.” Barry smiled and nodded. He went back to work, this time sliding Oliver’s underwear off of him, leaving him stark naked on the bed, 

“How do you want to do this? Do you want to be on your front? Or on your back?” Barry asked.  
“I want to see you.” Oliver said. And Barry nodded giving him another smile.  
“Alright, well lay back.” Barry got off the bed and shucked off his pants, pulling his shirt over his head before sliding his own underwear down, leaving the clothes in a pile on the floor to be dealt with later. 

“That’s better, I was feeling a bit exposed.” Said Oliver as Barry climbed back onto the bed and between his legs, Barry smiled and came up to nuzzle their noses before kissing him again. When they broke the kiss Barry kept his face close, whispering

"Do you want me to open you up or do you want to do it yourself?"

"I want you to..." Oliver said quietly.

"Alright... Well I know you said you wanted to do this face to face, and we can, just I think it would be easier to open you up if you were facing away from me on your knees. I'd have better access. Oliver seemed to be contemplating the suggestion. He eventually nodded his agreement and Barry gently gave a pat to his ass to encourage him to turn over. Oliver did so shakily,

"Rest your arms on the pillows and bend your knees for me," Oliver wriggled up the bed to reach the pillows. When he did he bent his knees, canting his hips up so that Barry could reach his ass easier. He felt the bed shift behind him and he knew that Barry was getting situated between his legs.

"Can I rim you?" Barry asked. Waiting patiently for an answer from Oliver. Oliver contemplated it for a few seconds before nodding.

"Alright, you're sure? I would really like verbal answers..."

"Yes. You can." Oliver said, Barry smiled and lowered himself down smiled

"Okay, I'm going to touch you now." He said before slowly brushing his fingers over Oliver's toned ass. He took a few minutes to massage the flesh trying to get Oliver to relax. When he was satisfied, he firmly placed one hand on each and pulled them apart, receiving Oliver's pink puckered hole. Oliver shivered when he felt the warm breath from Barry's lips fan over him. He braced himself for the feeling of Barry's tongue, but still was shocked when he felt the first lick. He shivered from his shoulders down to his toes, gripping the pillow and burying his face in it with a choked off cry.

"Fuck." He whimpered. Barry continued to gently palm his ass cheeks as he began to lick with fervor. He gently swiped his tongue in circles around the puckering entrance. Prodding at the hole occasionally with a stiff tongue. Not quite letting it slip inside yet though. His motions became more determined. Thumbs Massaging the globes of his ass before his hands pulled the cheeks even farther apart. Barry pulled back and spit, before using his tongue to spread the slickness of the saliva up the cleft of his ass. Before burying his nose in between the globes. His tongue beginning to prod into Oliver at a determined pace, until the tight clench of muscles gave way an he was able to fuck it inside. Barry pulled back again, landing another loogie between his cheeks, this time removing a hand from his as cheek and using it to spread the spit his fingers began to trace around the rim teasingly. And he watched as Oliver's hips bucked upwards. Begging for more. Oliver hadn't made very many sounds. And when Barry looked up he realized why. Oliver's face was stuffed so far into the pillow that he was probably close to suffocating himself. He pulled away quickly and Oliver immediately lifted his head, saying in a raw voice,

"Why'd you stop? Please don't stop..."

"I was about to come up and tell you to stop hiding. I was wondering why you weren't making any noise, you're practically suffocating yourself and that's not safe. Don't be afraid to make noise for me ok? In fact I want to hear you," Barry said, lying his body over Oliver's and draping his arms around the older man's neck from the back. He kissed his ear and check before quietly whispering  
"I want to hear you, I bet you sound beautiful." He felt Oliver nod beneath him and with one last peck on the lips he slid back down his body, reclaiming his place between Oliver's ass cheeks. He managed the area again for a few seconds realizing that he's tensed up again,

"Just relax." Barry said, before leaning down to lick a long stripe up his center. Tongue playfully tracing patterns at the small of his back. Barry would've smirked if he hadn't been busy tongue fucking Oliver at the sight before him. Oliver had pushed himself up onto his elbows his fast pants whimpers and frequent hitches of breath audible with every movement Barry delivered. Oliver's hands were fisting into the sheets and Barry could feel his feet twitching as well as he squirmed. Oliver didn't say much, but his high pitched whimpers were enough to let Barry know he was liking what he was doing. Oliver became more desperate as Barry continued his rimming assault. Grinding backwards onto the warmth of Barry's tongue while also trying to rub against the mattress to get friction against his own cock hardening between his legs. Finally it was becoming too much and he gripped the sheets with white knuckles,

"Barry... Barry... Oh my god... I'm going to cum. I need you. I need you inside me before I cum. Please. Please." Oliver begged.

"Shhh, shhh, it's alright, turn over, spread your legs again for me." Oliver almost kicked Barry in his haste to get back onto his back. But Barry's quick reflexes allowed him to doge the blow. He just smiled to himself, pleased that Oliver was enjoying this as much as he was. This was a position he'd not seen himself in with Oliver, and the knowledge that the older man was letting him do this was not only heartwarming, but really fucking hot. Oliver Queen, playboy, vigilante, castaway, former member of the Russian mob, was lying here in front of him. Offering himself up in the most intimate of ways to Barry. Allowing himself to be pulled apart at the seams and be seen in a state of disarray after he was fully wrecked. Barry couldn't even imagine how much this must've took for Oliver to open up to him like this. And he wasn't going to take it lightly. Realizing that he'd been lost in his thoughts he quickly snapped out of it. Using his super speed to lube his fingers and Oliver's ass up even more than it already had been and roll a condom onto himself as well.

"Wait." Oliver gasped.

"What?"

"I want to feel you... All of you. You're clean. I'm clean. Please. I need to feel you. With nothing in the way. Barry gulped but nodded as he began to role the condom back off. He took the lube in his hands and crawled back between Oliver's legs. He spread his asscheek again to reveal his asshole and poured a large amount of lube out onto his fingers before slicking them up the crack of his ass adding to the moister from the saliva and natural sweat that still remained. He coated his fingers with more and more and more lube and massaged the tight opening of  
Oliver's ass. Whispering soft encouragements. Before sliding his middle finger inside at a slow pace. He listened hearing Oliver's breath hitch as he was breached and the older man squirmed uncomfortably underneath him.

"Are you okay? Do you want to stop? Did I go to fast? Shit this is your first time..."

"No... It's ok... I-I've had something inside me before... Besides just my fingers..." Oliver panted out. Barry felt his eyes grow wide at this. So many different images dancing before his eyes. Needless to say he was intrigued.

"You have?" Barry licked his lips that had suddenly gone dry. "L-like what?" He stuttered the last part out, still trying to keep his brain on the slow strokes of his finger working in and out of Oliver's ass.

"Um... A few different butt plugs. I just. I just wanted to try to take off the urge...so I bought some. And this dildo. It wasn't very big. But it wasn't small per say. But that's all. Nobody... Nobody's ever been inside me." Barry's brain seemed to have short circuited. The mental images he was getting both slightly made his heart break, yet at the same time. Holy fuck that was so hot.

He heard Oliver give a low chuckle and he blushed when he realized he'd said that last part out loud. Oliver was seeming to relax. His hand had even come down to gently begin stroking at his own cock. "Do you think you can take another?" Barry asked.

"Yeah..." Oliver said. Barry slipped his fingers out and poured more lube onto his fingers. Before gently pressing two fingers into Oliver this time. He heard the sharp intake of breath and gently moved so be was kneeling between Oliver's legs again, rising up to be face to face with him. He kissed his neck, jaw, and cheek.

"Just relax. I swear it'll feel so much better if you just relax." Oliver nodded. His eyes still squeezed shut from the stretch. Barry was now not only moving two fingers inside Oliver but scissoring them as well. As minutes passed and Oliver's muscles relaxed the scissoring of his fingers became quicker and wider. His wrist twisting and fingers crooking an catching on the edge of his rim as he pulled out and pushed back in. "I'm going to add another now. Can you take it? Do you need a break?"

"No... Go on." Oliver's voice was smaller than he'd ever heard it before. He was hesitant but decided to take Oliver at his word and add another finger. This time three fingers were sliding their way in and out of his ass. Oliver felt his eyes roll back at the pressure. It was almost too much, and he whimpered. 

“Oliver? Are you sure you can take this? Do you want to stop?” 

“No… no… it’ll be fine… I’ll need to get past it eventually, no use putting it off… just… just… go slow…” 

“Always.” Barry said, “Unless you ever get to the point where you want it otherwise.” Oliver let out a laugh that waned off into a hiss as Barry moved again. 

“Just try to relax… it’ll be better soon… bear down… it might also help.” Oliver did as asked and Barry slid in deeper. He hissed, fisting his hands into the sheets. Barry felt tears well up in his eyes at the pain that Oliver was obviously feeling, he didn’t want to hurt him, but he knew that there was nothing he could do to help the discomfort. It would just have to pass on its own in time. He reached over and took the lube in his hands again, spreading more over the fingers in his ass. Sliding them back out and back in again. He reached up to run his fingers through Oliver’s hair, as little as he had, it was still comforting, he cooed at the older man, trying to work him through the stretch. 

“It’ll be better soon, just relax… remember you can tell me to stop at any time…” Barry said, leaning down to kiss Oliver again as he crooked his fingers upwards. Oliver keened, breaking the kiss and letting out a sob, 

“Ollie, are you sure, this… are you sure this isn’t too much?” Barry asked. 

“No, it’s… it’s fine… touch me… touch me while you… while you keep going… please…” Barry nodded and reached down to Oliver’s cock, stroking it slowly, as he began to move his fingers in and out of him again. It took a while, longer than Barry would’ve thought, but he didn’t mind, Oliver eventually began grinding back against his fingers and Barry finally felt confident to move things along. He pressed another long kiss to Oliver’s lips, 

“Are you ready for us to do this?” He asked. Oliver nodded, Barry gently pulled his fingers out and rolled back over on top of Oliver, gridding their cocks together and bracketing his head with his arms, wrapping one around the back of his head and bringing their lips together in another searing kiss. 

“I love you so much…” Barry said. 

“I love you too…” 

“Are you ready for me?” Oliver nodded, and Barry sat up, “Legs up, I need a bit more room hun,” Barry said, slicking his cock up as he waited for Oliver to move, 

“You might want to lean against the pillows too, I don’t know, it might be more comfortable.” Oliver nodded and situated the pillow behind his head. Barry continued to stroke his cock as he watched Oliver get comfortable… he scooted closer to Oliver and reminded him once again to tell him if he wanted to stop at any time. 

“I know, you’ve said it at least twenty times… come on… please… just… make love to me… please… I need you.” Oliver said. And Barry nodded. He pressed his dick against the cleft of Oliver’s ass and began to press in slowly. One hand was holding him up against the bed over Oliver while the other guided his member past the tight rim. Oliver hissed and whimpered at the stretch, one of his hands coming up to grip Barry’s arm, as Barry slid in a little farther, Oliver’s nails dug into him involuntarily. He whimpered loudly and gasped, letting out distressed noises of pain at the stretch. 

“Oh my god… Barry… Barry…” Oliver’s legs began to flail, toes flexing and head turning this way and that with his eyes pinched closed in pain as Barry pressed in. 

“It’s gonna be okay… it’ll feel ok soon, are you sure you don’t want to stop?” 

“No… no… I need you… fuck I need you so bad… please… please keep going… fuck it hurts.”  
“I know, I know, I’m sorry.” Barry bit his lip, he was so close to crying. Oliver looked like he was in so much pain, and the man had been in enough pain in his life already… Barry hated to watch him like this. He knew it would get better, but it was still difficult. He’d stopped momentarily, trying to let Oliver get used to the size of his cock. Oliver’s breaths came out in ragged pants.

“Move… keep going… it’s ok… I’ll be okay.” Oliver’s eyes opened and Barry locked their gazes as he pressed in farther. 

“I love you…” Barry told him again. 

“I know… fuck you’re huge…” A smile played a Barry’s lips at the comment, 

“I’m not exactly sure how to respond to that.” He said honestly, Oliver let out another laugh,  
“How about thank you?” Barry laughed as well, his laugh being cut off this time by a groan as he felt Oliver’s ass clench around him. Oliver moaned as well as he felt Barry jerk slightly.

“You’re so tight…” Barry said through clenched teeth as he slid in another inch. Oliver moaned and said, 

“Just fuck me… please… just go in the rest of the way… I can’t… I need to feel all of you… now… please…” Barry looked hesitant. He didn’t want to hurt him, but Oliver was trying to thrust himself downwards, and to no avail, becoming frustrated. 

“Please…” Oliver begged, and Barry couldn’t deny the man anything. So he slowly slid himself the rest of the way down, he didn’t have more than another three inches, but it was still a lot considering that it was Oliver’s first time. Oliver’s moan tapered off into a choked sob, he gripped the sheets and began to heave and gasp for air. 

“It hurts… it hurts…” 

“I know baby I know… I’m sorry, I knew I shouldn’t have done that.” Oliver’s eyes were squeezed shut in pain… tears beginning to fall from his eyes. Barry leaned down and kissed them away, he took a hold of his hands and interlocked their fingers together, 

“I’m sorry I’m hurting you… I’m so sorry…”  
“It’s ok… I told you to move… just… give me a few minutes.” Oliver said. Barry tried to move as little as possible, keeping their faces close together, allowing their lips to brush and breaths to fan over each other hotly. Oliver whined as he clenched around Barry’s cock reflexively. The stretch was gradually becoming less painful… he wanted Barry to move. 

“Barry… please… move.” Oliver gritted out. 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yes. Yes… god… please… please move.” Oliver begged, pulling him down on top of him, his hands grappling at his back and trying to grind up into his dick again. 

“Okay, okay… just calm down… I don’t want you to hurt yourself.” Oliver nodded shakily and held his breath as Barry slowly drew himself out a few inches before slowly sliding back in. he repeated his movements, building up a gradual rhythm. He let go of Oliver’s hands, moving to hold himself up over Oliver again as his thrusts picked up their pace. Oliver’s breaths coming out shallow as the feeling of discomfort inside of him blossomed into a new sensation, intensifying into one of pleasure. His breaths soon became deeper, dropping into pants again, his throat eliciting little whimpers of their own accord. He opened his eyes and looked up at Barry whose forehead was pressed against his. Barry’s mouth was open, he was panting hard as well, looking down between them to where their bodies connected so perfectly. 

“You’re so beautiful Ollie…” Barry gasped. Oliver whined again as he felt Barry pull back, placing hands on his hips and thrust even harder. Oliver grunted, his back arching slightly as Barry’s thrusts caused pleasure that he never knew existed to course through him. Tears formed in his eyes again, as he began to curse softly from the feelings. Emotional and physical, that were surrounding him, engulfing him, and overwhelming him. 

“Barry… you feel so good… oh my god… please… more… I love you so much… god you’re so amazing… you’re so fucking amazing… you feel so amazing. Give it to me… god never stop… please… more…” Oliver began to babble. Not knowing what was coming out of his mouth, only knowing that he needed, absolutely needed to articulate in some way just how grateful he was for Barry… and his willingness to do this for him… to do everything for him. Not just this… but everything… he needed to tell Barry how much he loved him, but his brain was short circuiting pleasure slamming into him, causing his senses to go into overdrive. 

“FUCK. GOD YES. HOLY SHIT… RIGHT THERE… Do that again… please… oh my god…” Oliver keened, screaming as he felt Barry shift and rub against a spot inside of him. 

“Oh shit!” Barry cursed, falling forward again, catching himself on his elbows, he was taken by surprise as Oliver clenched around him tightly in quick pulses. He’d stopped moving momentarily and when he came back to, he felt Oliver pawing at him and whimpering for more. He looked up at Oliver’s face. Tears were streaming down it from his eyes, his eyes alternated between squinting in pleasure, shutting completely, and being blown wide open. His head was tossing back and forth without control. Barry reached down and grasped Oliver’s cock, jerking it in time with his thrusts. 

“Barry… I’m going to cum…” 

“Yeah… come for me… that’s it… god you’re so tight… so beautiful underneath me… I love you so much, you’re so beautiful… and so brave… all I want is to make you feel good.” Barry said.  
“Feel… so good… please… god… harder…I’m almost there.” Oliver said. Barry drew his cock almost all the way out before thrusting in quickly. This stopped Oliver’s movements and he took in a sharp breath. 

“Did I hurt you?” Barry asked, 

“God. Fuck… no… you… oh fuck… more…” Oliver babbled. “Right there… do that again… fuck…” Oliver twitched and quivered, his hands clutching the bedsheets harder than ever as he let Barry reach underneath him and lift his ass off the bed before thrusting back in, making the angle even better. He was thrusting straight into his prostate now and his hand was working at his dick quickly as well. He watched a bead of sweat drop from Barry’s brow, his own eyes clenched shut at this point, teeth grinding together as Oliver’s ass squeezed around him and gripped him in a torturous hold. Oliver felt a familiar stir in his gut, and he knew it wouldn’t be long now before he’d be coming. A few more thrusts to his sweet spot later and he cried out Barry’s name. Coming between the two of them. Thick ropes of cum covered Barry’s hands, and he heard the man whimper, and choke out a “so fucking beautiful” before emptying inside him as well. Barry continued to thrust, riding out his orgasm, he gradually slowed his thrusts to a stop. Panting as he looked down at the man beneath him who was breathing heavily and looking thoroughly debauched. Barry pulled out of the older man slowly, and Oliver let his legs stretch back out, although he still left them spread, in order for Barry to stay in between them. Barry came back up to his face, wiping his hand on the sheets before cupping Oliver’s face with both hands, pressing their noses and foreheads together and kissing him passionately again. He tried to pull away, but Oliver whimpered, nipping at his bottom lip and drawing him back in, before he knew it, Oliver’s tongue was making its way into his mouth. He moved his hands so that his thumbs brushed away the tears falling from Oliver’s eyes. When they pulled away for air, Oliver looked down between them, not able to meet Barry’s eyes again, 

“Thank you… thank you so much… you’re amazing… that was amazing… I love you.” 

“Ollie,” Barry whispered, trying to tip the older man’s chin up so that he could see his eyes, but Oliver would turn away every time he tried. Finally he took his face in his hands again and forced him to look at him, 

“Look at me, Oliver… I love you. I would do literally anything for you at this point. That was beyond amazing for me too, and it’s absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.” 

“I-I’m not ashamed for liking it anymore… I just… I wish I wasn’t so emotional right now… I just… I don’t even know why I’m crying.” Oliver said exasperated. Barry rolled off of him and pulled the older man’s head into his chest, resting his chin on the top of his head and wrapping his arms around him protectively. 

“It’s ok… don’t be ashamed for crying… you’re so strong… you deserve a moment of weakness… it’s not healthy to hold it all in.” 

“I don’t feel like I’m crying just because I’m sad though or hurting… or overwhelmed…I’m also crying because I’m happy… I’m so happy… I’m so overjoyed to have someone like you in my life and it leaves me in a state of disbelief… you could have had anyone in the world, yet you chose me.” 

“I could say the same thing about you Mr. Queen.” Barry said. Oliver let out a laugh like he didn’t believe it, which he didn’t. 

“I’m serious…” Barry said. And Oliver just nodded, he felt himself finally starting to calm down and was becoming tired. He didn’t want to get all worked up again so he just agreed, even if internally he was still a bit unsure. 

“I wish you could see yourself the way I do…” Barry said. Placing a kiss to the top of his head. “As a strong, selfless, brave, and wonderful man… one I couldn’t be prouder to call mine…” Oliver nuzzled into Barry’s chest before lifting his head. Barry smiled down at him and pressed another kiss to his mouth. 

“I’m tired.” Oliver said. 

“Did I wear you out? Are you turning into an old man already?” Barry joked. Oliver grunted and gave one of Barry’s nipples a tweak, causing Barry to squeak in indignation. 

“Too tired for you to make fun of me now… after a nap…” Oliver said. Burrowing underneath the covers, they’d clean up when he had more strength, he didn’t care how filthy he was now. Barry had pulled apart every piece of him in the most pleasant way, and now he wanted to rest and heal back up for more. He allowed Barry to be the big spoon this time, wrapping an arm around him and resting his head in the crook of his neck as he drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit, that's a lot of smut... 17,000+ words... oh well. Thanks for reading! Much love!

**Author's Note:**

> Or not… Next part Oliver finally gets passed his fears, doubts, and pride and bottoms… Thanks for reading, I’m gifting this to Granvas & Lady Dragon because they’re both really awesome. Granvas always reblogs my writing on tumblr with the best tags, and Lady Dragon left me the nicest comments on here!


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